And another sick day

Here I am, sat at home writing this new blog post as I'm too sick and tired to go to work...yet again.

I think I've pushed myself a little too far in the last couple of weeks, mostly by working a six day week, not giving myself much chance to rest.

I developed a sore throat on Friday and it's progressively become more sore, like it's raw all the way down my throat and then the cough started on Sunday. It sounds really chesty, like I've been smoking for about 40 years but I went to the doctor's yesterday and was told it isn't on my chest and I just have a viral throat infection. Unfortunately I had a couple of coughing fits in the night and the sore throat kept me awake once that had stopped so I was too tired to go into work today.

I'm still not very good at accepting I can't do everything all the time. I don't want to sit at home storing up energy, I don't want to take sick days off work. I find it hard to justify to myself taking days off work because I'm tired or because I have a throat infection, things that previously wouldn't have prevented me from going to work. I worry about what my colleagues will think of me for taking time off with seemingly minor things. I agonise about taking time off, thinking of all the reasons I shouldn't - 'I can't take time off for a cold', 'I can't take time off just because I'm tired', 'I can't leave everyone with my work to do...again', 'what will everyone think?', 'I'm worried about the number of sick days I'm using' and I need to then weigh that against my ability to physically get out of bed, drive to work safely and my ability to do my job - I have fallen asleep at my desk before and drooled on my hand! They say that in your 30's you develop more self confidence and care less about what people think of you - have only turned 30 8 months ago, this has yet to happen to me, but I'm looking forward to it!

But today I have stayed off, partly because I feel so rubbish and tired and partly because my boyfriend James really wants me to look after myself and my health and believes I should but that ahead of everything else, even work. I would totally agree with him if it wasn't about me lol. I'm good at finding a reason why I should be in work. Maybe I should try to look after my health more in the hopes that I won't suffer with PVFS for years on end.

Here's to being back in work tomorrow... ;-)